|1.||Offer to make one meal for the day. Procrastinate. Then back out.|
|2.||Keep your feet on floor while its still wet.|
|3.||Do not fold clothes when asked to.|
|4.||Lights : On! Lights : Off! Repeat once. Repeat twice. Claim to not know when asked.|
|5.||Hide the TV Remote.|
|6.||Seize being an adult. Claim that you are an year old baby need to sleep all day.|
|7.||Repeat everything she says.|
|8.||Walk into room. Scream. Leave. Don’t provide explanation.|
|9.||Talk to your imaginary friend.|
|10.||Pretend to be asleep every time she tries to talk to you.|
|11.||Walk/Run into random furniture. Claim that Furniture have been plotting against you.|
|12.||Have a nervous breakdown regarding the color of your bedroom walls.|
|13.||Watch the same movie on repeat mode with really loud volume.|
|14.||Have a fight with yourself.|
asked to fetch a glass of water. State all the benefits of walking and how
her health is more important so you are going to let her walk and get her own
glass of water.
to eat non-moving non-living objects and then declare how pathetic they taste
and probably need some ketchup or salt added.
|17.||Hide in the closet. Tell that you are trying to find the exit to Narnia.|
|18.||Ask after every one minute, are we there yet?|
|19.||Ask all sorts of dumb questions.|
having dinner. Take a bite. Stand up. Dance. Sit. Take a bit. Stand up.
|21.||Pretend your finger is glued to your face and you cannot remove it.|
|22.||Make up stories of your past birth and claim to know the future of this planet.|
|23.||Speak gibberish. Pretend it is actual language you learned. Ask your friend to join in.|
|24.||Eat your hair.|
|25.||When shopping, point at everything and say, “I want that. Can I have that."|
|26.||For every sentence say, Yes but no. No but yes. Yes but no.|
asked to call someone. Just yell there name and say the person is probably
sleeping as they did not hear you call.
|28.||Just stare at her.|
|29.||Follow her everywhere and not say a word when asked why.|
|30.||Change timing on all the clocks and pretend you can time travel.|
yelled at for being on phone a lot. Keep the phone down and start yelling
at phone for getting you in trouble.
|32.||Tell her you miss her after every 5 minutes.|
|33.||Pretend you are Dragon.|
|34.||Eat everything that you can find. Everything!|
|35.||Jump and hop everywhere.|
|36.||Pretend to be a robot.|
|37.||Pretend to be a slave and reply with "yes master" "no mater."|
|38.||Pretend that you have lost your memory and do not recognize anyone.|
|39.||Try to convince her that you are adopted.|
in kitchen and eat everything that she tries to cook and ask for more
on your phone as if you are a secret agent and claim to talk later as
someone is listening over.
|42.||Mute her favorite TV show and guess everything that is happening.|
her to cook something which has exact amount of ingredients. Make her
take out her measuring spoons to be sure.
her for your school uniform because there are so many memories associated
with it. Insist.
|45.||Remind her that you love her - every 3 minutes!|
Sunday, April 23, 2017
So, my mother, probably the most sweetest creature on Earth, and the one I annoy the most asked me how do I manage to get on her nerves all the time. Being the obedient lady that I am; I made a list!! A few of which I am a pro at and some which I would be trying out soon. (P.S. Attempt at your own risk, no responsibility will be taken for what follows)
45 ways to annoy my Mother
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
I broke my rules for you,
You broke me for your rules.
Irony laughed at me,
As I embraced truth of your falsehood.
No one stays forever, you said
But I did stay. Still you left.
Solitude is what I seek now,
Destiny has had its laugh.
Love was what I sought,
You never thought of it though.
Away & far from you I tried to be,
But you always found a way for me to see.
And then you played the winning shot,
Broke me into pieces and salt over it was add on.
Should have let me go when I tried,
Commitment was a thing in which you never took pride.
Blessed I am, for my tears get a count,
For each one I shed, Karma will give a shout.
Fear, baby, you should feel,
For shattering someone else's dream.
But guts, I must say, you have,
For you still remain unaffected, laugh as I cry.
Queen I thought I was for making you my King,
I made you everything, I lost everything.
Proud you must be for all the by-gones,
You are the reason I would never ever love.
As you move on, I am stuck at what if's and might be's,
Look at me, eye to eye, and tell yourself 'pain? I don't see'.
With every exhale, I become a bit more hallow,
Numb to feelings, stranger to happiness, to unknown I bow.
Once an wonderful soul, now becomes a mere stone,
Live with yourself knowing you made it so.
Oh yes, you will, you do, laugh and smile with another,
But you will crave me, the way I do you, dear.
When you realise your loss, you will wish to come back,
By then I will be far from here and be forever gone.
You still don't see it, do you? All this mess!
You destroyed a person in your selfishness!
Yes, my mistake, I broke all my rules for you!
And you broke me for your rules!
- April 12, 2017